So Gone Pt.1...

*Sorry for leaving you guys on that BS ending last chapter. Management has spoken with  me and It won't happen again.  Any Freaking WHO, sorry for the delay! Enjoy my Darlings.*


It had been five days and Nicki had nursed Safaree back to health but was still not letting him out of the bed because she felt he would get sick all over again. Safaree was so sick of chicken noodle soup, if he never ate it again he wouldn't complain. He was happy that she has switched his medicine from regular NyQuil to the Daytime kind, he didn't want to keep sleeping his life away.

"Soup time." Nicki said entering the room with a tray.

"Nicki I'm not sick anymore, I can eat solid foods." he chuckled a little bit at her facial expression.

"Just eat boy." She placed the tray over his lap.

"Can I at least have some chips or something?"

"I'll think about it after you eat and take your medicine." She pointed to the tray, she left the room to check on the kids. Zaria still had a bad cough but wasn't running a fever any more. The other two had runny noses which Nicki was grossed out by but blew their little noses anyway.

Safaree sat in the bed watching a marathon of First 48 trying to down his soup but couldn't stomach it so he put the tray to the side. He began thinking about Nicki and how he didn't know what he would do with out her. She at times was the glue that held everything together for him. He loved her like she was blood. The past month had been weird for him. Feelings had been stirred up that he hadn't had in awhile for Nicki. He didn't think he could hold back any longer.


"Okay I got the kids down, I had to fight with Zaria to go to bed because she wanted a pickle and I said no then she wanted to whine about it." Nicki sat on the bed and looked at Safaree, he stared back intently. Nicki broke the gaze and looked at the tray. "Safaree you didn't touch this."

"I told you I didn't want it."

"You have to eat."

"Forget about that right now." Safaree grabbed Nicki's hand. "Thank you for nursing me back to health."

"No problem Safaree." She touched the side of his face then frowned. "Are you running a fever again?"

"No Nicki." he looked off to the side as she got up and went to the dresser and got the thermometer.

"Here." She slipped it under his tongue, when it beeped she looked at it. "98.6."

"Told you." he smiled. "Now sit I wasn't done talking to you."

"Are you sure you don't feel sick?"

"Girl I haven't been sick for two today's."

"I'll get you a cold towel." Safaree huffed as she went into the bathroom. "Let me put this on your head." she walked back out with a wet cloth and sat on the bed next to him and placed it on him. "Does this feel better?" she looking down at his face.

"No but this does." he sat up and hugged her tight around her waist with his head on her chest. Nicki froze.

"Safaree please."

"Please what?"

"Don't."  her hands were too her side. "Don't do this to me."

"We have been walking around this last month with all this sexual tension, why not just release it?" He kissed the top of her breast.

"Safaree you know why." she tried moving away but he wouldn't let her budge.

"You want me just as much as I want you baby." she felt something pull at her heart when he said that last word, she swallowed before she spoke.

"Safaree I'm so confused on what I want right now. One minute I'm so sure Damon is what I want then you come and say something or do something and my head gets all fuzzy." Safaree kissed her breast again. "Safaree stop I can't think straight."

"Well don't think just let go." he kissed her cheek.

A vision of Damon's face popped into her head, a vision of him leaving came soon after. She felt Safaree's lips hit her spot and she let go like he told her too. Wrapping her arms around his neck she gave into all the lustful thoughts she had been having about Safaree over the past month or so.

Nicki straddled Safaree's waist and kissed him deeply while Safaree reached for the bottom of her shirt and pulled it up and over her head. Nicki was left in her bra and pajama shorts. Safaree laid her back on the bed kissing her down her torso when he got to the top of her bottoms he stopped and looked up at her.

"Are you sure?" he asked.

"Safaree don't grow a conscience now." she said staring at the sealing.

Safaree pulled her bottoms off and began to finish what he had started.

--

Nicki woke up to her ringtone going off. She climbed out from underneath the covers and tried to locate the phone without opening her eyes. She searched around the night stand and found it.

"Hello." She groggily said into the receiver. But the tune kept playing, she opened her eyes to read the words across the screen:

DRESS FITTING AT 10AM!.

Nicki closed the phone and turned over and snuggled up to the warm hard body next to her. She wrapped her leg around his and took in his smell and then stopped all movement. Gone was the smell of Burberry cologne she had grown accustomed too, instead her nostrils were filled with the sent of Gucci men's that she loved so much.

"Safaree." she whispered to herself or so she thought.

"What Nic?" he answered. Nicki rolled out of the bed with the speed of a ninja and wrapped her body in the comforter. "What the hell Nicki it's cold give me back the comforter." Safaree forcefully opened his eyes to see the guilty look on her face.

"Oh my God." is all Nicki repeated over and over again with her hand over her mouth as the events of the nights flooded her mind. Safaree sat up with the sheet over his lower half.

"Nicki breath." he said as she began to pace the floor.

"What have I done? I can't believe I did it again."

"Nicki calm down."

"What the hell do you mean calm down Safaree? I have had sex with you twice while still in a relationship. What the hell is wrong with me?" She plopped down in the chair next to his balcony doors.

"Nothing is wrong with you Nicki."

"NO! Something must be wrong with me because I keep ending up in the bed with the man who dumped me like I was nothing."

"Don't start the dramatics Nicki. You know that's not how it went down."

"It might not have went down like that for you but to me that's how it damn sure seemed." Her phone went off again this time she recognized the ringtone, it was Damon's. She just stared at the phone on the stand until it stopped ringing. "I can't deal with this now, I have to get ready for my fitting." she got up and headed for the guest room.

"Wait!" Safaree scrambled out of bed with the sheet around him. "You still going to marry this guy after what just happened last night?"

"That's my fiancee Safaree, yes. Now move out of my way." she tried to go around but he blocked her again.

"Are you serious? Nicki come on."

"'Nicki come on.' what?" she searched his face. "Did you really think one night of pleasure with you was going to make me leave my fiancee? Nigga you must be out your mind." She pushed past him and ran into the guest room shutting the door and locking it. Safaree stood in the door way of his room looking dumb founded.

Dress Fitting


Nicki pulled up to Vera Wang's New York loft with her mother, Zaria, Lauren, TT, Terrence, and Candi in tow three hours later. When she left Safaree's house it was in haste to get away from him. Every time she stepped into his house she ended up underneath him. Her thoughts were going a mile a minute, they had reached the loft floor and Nicki hadn't realized until Candi pushed her so she could get out of the elevator.

"Where is your head at girl?" Candi asked looking back at her as she passed her. Nicki said nothing and proceeded into the very spacious and private loft. He mom noticed Nick's mind was elsewhere but decided to save the conversation for later.

"Nicki darling how are you my love?" Vera appeared from around a corner in a over sized long sleeved black shirt, black leggings, and black ankle high boots.

"Hi Ms. Wang."

"Stop with the formalities, it's Vera." She pulled her into a hug.

"Okay." she pulled away smiling. "I would like you to meet my three best friends Lauren, Tyeshia, and Candi."

"Hello." Vera said. And was greeted by all three.

"This is my hairstylist Terrence."

"Hello handsome."

"Hi." he said waving.

"This is one of my beautiful daughters Zaria. Say hi Z-bear."

"Hi." Zaria said hiding behind her mommy's leg.

"Hi pretty girl, don't be shy. Are you going to help mommy pick out a dress?" Zaria nodded her head.

"And last but not least my mother."

"Hello Ms. Wang." Mrs. Carol extended her hand and shook Vera's.

"So this is who we get to thank for this beauty standing here." She said referring to Nicki. Mrs. Carol blushed. "Are you ready to find your dress pretty lady?"

"As ready as I'll ever be." Nicki said forcing a smile, she was not in the right mind frame to look at bridal dresses. She followed Vera up the stairs to the second floor and her jaw dropped at the sight before her. Vera had 50 girls in four lines all modeling wedding dresses. "Wow." she said like a kid entering Disney World for the first time.

"That's the look I like to see." Vera said. "Start at any dress or we can sit and have them model them for us, it's up to you."
Nicki felt tugging on her hand and looked down to see a wide eyed Zaria.

"Model mommy, model." She said smiling.

"It looks like we will have a fashion show."

"Alright, Karen Champagne for everyone and orange juice in a flute for the little one."

They all took seats at one end of the room and waited. They were handed a packet with a picture of each dress and a comment section, even Zaria got one. Soft Music began to play and the first girl stepped up on the small runway. Nicki looked down at Zaria and seen her facial expression while looking at the dress, it matched Nicki's thoughts, a definite no.

 An hour later Nicki was down to three dresses and was now trying them on. She came out in the first one and stood in front of the mirrors.

"How do you feel in it baby?" her mom asked.

"I feel fine." Nicki said blandly.

"If you don't feel fireworks baby it's not the one." her mom said.

"Well I guess this isn't it." She stepped down and went back behind the curtain to try on the second dress then came back out. "Baby girl you look beautiful."

"Thanks mommy." she looked at her through the mirrors.

"You look like a princess mommy." Zaria said.

"I do?" she asked wide eyed.

"Yes."

"Thank you baby."

"So how do you feel Nic?" Terrence asked.

"There's a fizzle but I don't know Tee. Do you think it looks to plain?" she asked smoothing down the front of the dress and looking over the beading.

"Well it's not Nicki Minaj style, but you do look beautiful." he stated.

"It's not it, on to the next." She looked at herself again then went to change.

"This child is hard to please." Vera said to Mrs. Maraj.

"You're only seeing a snippet of what it could be." she responded. Nicki came out smiling.

"I like this one." Nicki stepped in front of the mirror and stared at herself. Vera stood and started to pull and pin the gown. It was a strapless mermaid gown with floating multi-layered lace appliqué and sunburst petal pleated train with grosgrain multi-bow sash.

"Fireworks?"

"No not fireworks ma but I like it."

"But you don't love it."

"I'll learn." Nicki snapped back.

"You're not supposed to learn Onika, you should have a connection before you buy it." her mom said sternly. Everyone in the room remained quiet as the two had a stare down, Nicki eventually losing.

"Like I said I'll learn." She looked to Vera. "I'll take it."

"This is such a plain dress for your personality." Vera said.

"I want to be Onika on my wedding day not Nicki Minaj."

"Are you sure this is Onika?" her mom asked.

"Yes mom." she said annoyed with her.

"Fine get the dress then, it's your wedding day!" Mrs. Maraj got up and put on her shades and went to the elevator.

"I'll go wait with her." Candi said.

"Fine." Nicki went to take off the dress.

"Can I go with Nana mommy?"

"No sit there until I'm done." Zaria frowned and sat back in her chair until Nicki walked out with the dress and handed it to Vera's assistant. "You have my measurements right?"

"Yes, I will call you for your first fitting. Remember to try to remain the same weight."

"Don't worry I will, bye Vera see you soon." Nicki slipped on her shades, grabbed Zaria's hand and walked to the elevators to leave.

SB's House

Safaree sat on his balcony thinking about Nicki. He knew he had messed up in leaving her years ago and now it was too late because she had found another man. "But why can't she resist me if she loves him?" he asked himself. Even though he left her he never stopped loving her they just weren't good for each other at the time. They both had grown up a lot and were in a better place in there lives. He wanted to know if they could make it as a couple but knew Nicki would refuse.

Safaree got up and went inside to check on Daria and Ethan. They were laying in his bed taking a nap, Daria  had her hand on Ethan's face as they slept. He went over and re-positioned her in the bed. Looking over at the clock he realized Nicki should be back soon.

Nicki had dropped off everyone and was now heading back to Safaree's house with Zaria, she had fallen asleep with her head in Nicki's lap. She planned on talking to Safaree when she got there. Nicki called Damon.

"Hey Nic."

"Hi babe. What are you doing."

"Nothing much just taking my lunch break, you?"

"Just came from my dress fitting."

"Really? Did you pick out a dress that would do you justice?" she smiled.

"I tried. I don't think you will be disappointed."

"Is it white?"

"Uh no." she said laughing. "I have three reasons why I can't where white." she looked down at Zaria and ran her hand over her hair.

"Oh yeah."

"Damon what are you in here doing?" Nicki heard a females voice come from his end of the receiver.

"Who is that Damon?" Nicki asked.

"What do you need Lesley?" Damon asked in a hushed tone. Nicki had a shocked expression on her face as she listened. Damon came back on the line. "Hey babe I have to go."

"Wait who was that Damon?"

"Nobody baby, listen I'll call you later to check on you and the kids." he hung up. Nicki sat stunned staring off at nothing in particular. She didn't notice the driver had pulled up to the house until she felt a breeze against her arm. She looked up and seen Safaree smiling at her, he grabbed Zaria out of the car.

"How did the fitting go?" he extended his hand to her and helped her out the car.

"It went fine." she mumbled.

"Did you find a dress?"

"Yeah. Put her down then come into the kitchen we need to talk. Where are my other babies?"

"Sleep." he closed the front door and went to go lay her with her siblings then walked to the kitchen.

Nicki was siting at the island sipping a bottle of water. Safaree looked at her funny because she was in a daze.

"Nicki are you okay."

"Yeah, come sit." She patted the seat next to her.

Safaree sat next to her knowing what the conversation was about. Nicki sat her water down and took Safaree's hand.

"Safaree I don't know what it is but obviously there is something between us that's not going away. I learned to suppress my feelings for you. Then I met Damon and thought they were gone. He treated me so well. I don't know why I keep ending up sleeping with you, now I'm catching feelings when I know you feel nothing for me. I'm so confused about what I want right now in my life, Safaree I know I want you in some aspects but I'm not ready to give up Damon either."

"So what are you saying Nicki?" Safaree asked.

"I guess I'm saying I want my cake and eat it too."

"You want to have an affair with me?" he asked with a shocked face.

"Yeah, I guess I am." she studied his face. "What do you think?" she chewed on the corner of her bottom lip. Safaree just sat there for awhile trying to process her proposal. He had never been involved in an affair before. He did want Nicki but he wanted her to himself. He knew he couldn't pressure her to change her mind about leaving Damon so he figured he would just have to show her that he was the best man for her. So for now he would go along with her idea.

"I guess Nicki, if that's the only way i can be close to you again then I'll go along with it." he stared into her eyes. "Are you sure this is what you want Nic?" She shook her head yes.

"Safaree this is no strings attached. You can't get jealous and start drama."

"I understand." he would abide by her terms...for now. He wanted her back and he was going to do whatever it took to do just that.

"Okay." Nicki had no clue what she was getting herself into but she that Safaree would give her the attention she was seeking. Damon was being selfish so why couldn't she. Nicki planned on finding out all she could on this Lesley woman.

"So now what do we do?" Safaree asked. Nicki looked up at him and screwed her face up.

"I don't know these things, I've never had an affair before. Figure it out." She hopped off the stool and went to check on the kids.

"Just like her to come up with an idea and I have to figure it out." Safaree said to himself. He ran his hands over his face. "What have you gotten yourself into dummy?"

*SO what do ya think? How do you feel about the ending? COMMENT pls. I don't know how you guys feel about the story that's why it's hard for me to write because i don't know if you are actually enjoying it. HONESTY you guys! Thank you in advance to the ones that will comment.*

AUDIO
Listen to this to understand a little of what is going on in Nicki's mind.
Jill Scott- So Gone (What My Mind Says)